Dance in the Rain

by: a Little Rock Desired Haven Family Care mother

Dear Lord, I’ll trust you, when my heart is sad. 

Dear Lord, I’ll trust you, when the good days seem to all turn bad. 

Dear Lord, I’ll trust you, even when I don’t know the way. 

Dear Lord, when in doubt, always remind me to come to you and pray. 

Dear Lord, When I am weak, help me to be strong. When my anxiety puts up a fight and reminds me of all that I have done wrong. 

Remind me Oh Lord, that your Son came and paid the price for me.  

Dear Lord, please be my strength when I am alone. 

For this test I must take in the quietness of your throne. 

I am searching for you Lord. I am wanting more than just a zeal. 

In the chaos sweet Lord, keep my heart still. 

This too shall pass Oh Lord! 

The darkness will soon fade. 

But if you choose not to make the storm stop, 

Teach me to dance in the rain. 

I wrote this poem the week I moved to Desired Haven. Little did I know I would need some pretty durable rain boots, because at times, the rain did surely poor. I remember the words so vividly, when it was asked, “How am I living?” and my response was, “I’m just trying to survive.” There is truly a difference, I believe, in living and existing. 

Before coming to Desired Haven, I was certainly just existing. The quiet, shy, mom that was just going to do whatever was necessary to make it through the program. As I began to take my focus off people, as well as my past, and place everything I was, and everything I had into the hands of God, there was an indescribable peace placed inside of me that I have never felt. 

So many things that I had asked God for that I just didn’t put enough faith behind, started to manifest. I started to see God move in little ways. Like when I came to Desired Haven, I stayed in a room titled Hope. We all could a need a little of that at times. Then shortly after, I moved to a room called Faith. Faith is the substance of things hoped for, and the evidence of things not seen.  

I had the hope that God would do anything, but now I needed to trust that he would do it, in his own timing of course.  

I believe entering into the doors of Desired Haven has truly been a blessing, that I did not see coming. It was not always easy. Group Living can be tough! But when you have God in your corner, it is totally worth it. 

Since being here, I have officially graduated with an Associate’s Degree in Pharmaceutical Health Sciences. I am working towards being nationally certified, my kids are in great schools (and are thriving), and God has truly brought my family together. My son, Grayson, who feared the thought of baptism when we first came, gave his life to the Lord last month. The fire for the Lord burns bright in his little soul, at only 7! His faith has surely increased my own, and made me want to better my relationship in Christ. My little baby, August, who I was carrying when I arrived, is turning 1 soon! Oh, how time flies! My daughter, Normani, has soared beyond my wildest dreams. 

Grateful is an understatement when I think about Desired Haven! 

Whether times were good or bad, I’m thankful that God taught me to DANCE IN THE RAIN!